Saturday, January 16, 2010

Team Boy: 1. Team Stephanie: 0.

When the door of happiness closes, another opens; but, often times, we look so long at the closed door that we don't even see the new one which has been opened for us. ~Unknown

I am acutely aware of the fact that I am wanted. I am also acutely aware of the fact that I have recently been rejected. Now, to be honest, fault really lies on both him and I for my current state of unhappiness. Yet I still blame myself as most women do. Am I not pretty enough? Smart enough? Funny enough?

At this point you may feel like slapping me or shaking some sense into me. I understand, I have felt the same way with some of my friends when they voice the same concerns. Yet there is something inherently and downright sad and pathetic about our species, women. We just can't get it that we are GOOD ENOUGH as is. We are so wrapped up in attempting to change for a man that we loose sight of the ultimate goal, being loved for who we are. Simply who we are, nothing more and nothing less.

Now back to being wanted. As I previously mentioned I have been rejected. It's not fair to generalize the demise of our "relationship" (or lack thereof) but I will say that it boiled down to me wanting commitment, him NOT wanting commitment. Team Boy takes the goal. When one party doesn't want it, there's no point in trying to coerce them into something. The relationship will be doomed from the start.

So I get rejected and (God love her) the Universe responds. I check my phone and I am getting some seriously random texts or calls from guys that I have either not heard from or seen in months, if not years. Men I once dated, men I've never dated, and men I spent only a few short hours with (let's try to keep this PG shall we?). I've got dates lined up this week with men that I am worried I won't even recognize because it's been so long since I've seen them! Maybe the Universe is trying to tell me something? Or perhaps, show me something? Let's hope Team Stephanie prevails.

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