Tuesday, January 12, 2010

Peter, I Heart You.

I was recently stopped on the street by an 88 yr old man who fell in love with me. It's great when men tell me how pretty I am. Really, it makes my day. So funny because I actually don't find myself attractive, so when I'm told I am I immediately fall in love with you. I gotta work on that.

Back to Peter, the 88 yr old man. Dressed in an Armani suit, a dark wool coat and carrying a Hermes umbrella, I knew immediately he was old-school San Francisco. I love that. He opens the conversation with, "You were supposed to model today, but you missed your appointment didn't you?" God I love senior citizens. So of course I'm hooked and let him continue the conversation. Among the many things he continues to tell me, I will share a few of his bits of advice.

1. Don't get fat. According to Peter, "I'm so tired of seeing these elephants and seals. You are beautiful. Don't get fat, it's not worth it. Men don't like you when you are fat." Awesome, I just renewed my gym membership.

2. "A woman has 11 holes. Men have 10. Watch what you put in all your holes." Interestingly enough he made a few gestures to accompany this comment which were quite entertaining. I will not be handing out all access passes. You gotta be VIP to get this shiznaz.

3. Lastly, and most importantly, "The more you do for a man, the less he does for you." Excellent advice Peter. He continues to tell me about his 89 yr old wife, Stella, and how she makes him work for it. If you hand a man everything, he doesn't want it. If you make him work for it, it triggers his primal hunter within. Let the Game begin.

1 comment:

  1. hahahaha. Love it, and such a fitting post after your last one.

    I want to be old school San Francisco. It sounds so glamorous. I'd also like to own an Hermes anything. :)